Monday, April 28, 2008
how are you blog?(:
haha.i haven't blogged for the longest time!and after i went to read my friends' blogs i suddenly had the urge to blog.don't want this blog to be dead.
its like a growing process the first half of 2008
i've grown quite a bit, emotionally.tough, but once the going gets tough, the tough gets going!right?
hurhur.
im still a kid inside, sometimes i need my girls to decide for me.cos im a kid lah bitch.
i know what's good for me, but i think with my backside.hehe.
last week was the last week of diploma in mass comm at mdis!
ohmygod.typing this makes me wanna cry.i will miss dmcd1 0742A.
i've got a secret plan i cannot share, until i succeed.
watch this space bitches!(:
what we could have been, 12:00 AM.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
off day.
SUCKED
SUCKED
what we could have been, 1:12 AM.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
16.04.08 we are pretty, not cutie :D
16.04.08 my private k session with xiao zhu (^(oo)^)v
16.04.08 k-ing 2 xin jin zhong de ren, happy!(:
16.04.08 2nd day at work; inside locker room.
the uniform is not biang!before adding the apron&cap =x
16.04.08
yesterday mood was really really very bad.but im still all smiles cos i didn't want to be grumpy and spoil everybody's mood.then suddenly stef bb said she felt like k-ing and i did too.so i called bert bb immediately and within like 45 minutes we're at cine's kbox.haha it was like jie lun's concert at first, every song is like damn emotional; especially hei se you mo, but than when i sang fan fan's mei na me ai ta i totally straighten out my thoughts, which is a good thing really!i made a few drastic changes after that.i think im slowing getting over it, re-constructing my mindset.all i need now is my buddies to get my back, to catch me when im falling or it will just be a vicious cycle.
so nice to be able to lie on bert's shoulder, and feel like:"old friend, you understand me the best."
yesterday really felt very sucky, so teared up a bit but i didn't brawl.cannot brawl my mascara and eyeliner will run.and i think my darlings will be freaked out.haha(:
i thought i was late for work yesterday.but actually it was my clock that was fast.haha(: my watch is set five minutes faster than ikea's clock.so phew!=x
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Today's my first off day!(:
and yesterday's my 2nd day at work.im a hotdog girl at ikea cafe.and my tag line is:
HI, CAN I HAVE YOUR RECIEPT PLEASE?
work is alright, its quite brainless.haha
but on the 23rd or some date around that week i'll be going up to restaurant.
like they said im restaurant de ren.but they say i'll be asking for a transfer back to the cafe in a week.so taoyan.they make it sound like restaurant is hell.
like they said im restaurant de ren.but they say i'll be asking for a transfer back to the cafe in a week.so taoyan.they make it sound like restaurant is hell.
whatever.
i haven't tried anyway.i think it will be alright.
on the 1st day at work, i met nelson.
then, yesterday jung moo came and say hi.haha
then i saw mr kenny!(: so happy.
but on my off day no one is free to go out and play with me, sigh.
since ma don't need my help to feed the strays im free.somebody call me text me something, save me from myself.im bored!
except i have to do one last document for TVRP.simple one.which i can do at night(:
stef&big bad baobei bert is busy,
stef baobei busy making a birthday card for xiao bai(: very sweet.very long never do this kind of stuff, really very happy while in the progress of making it.
for my next boyfriend, im going to make a lot of handicrafts,going to bake a lot, cook a lot.
spoil him like crazy(: haha.
i really have the da jie character, like to take care of people.haha okay LAH.
i got auntie heart):
bertbert got school+rubgy training.
so no one soul can keep me company.damn it.
i think i will just sleep my off day away, so wasted.
waiting for saturday to come!going to watch my daughter's movie(:
what we could have been, 1:47 PM.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Gonna go to work at Ikea Cafe today at 4pm.
Hope all the aunties are nice, cos i like aunties and they like to tell stories.haha(:
classes with pahman is like wtf, seriously.you can see sana singh literally bootlicking him.
i don't think i heard a word he said in class today, im so done with the assignments.
so done and over with!YAY!(:
they say i need to make up my mind.
yeah i think i already did last night, thank you all for being so honest.
even though i seem confused.but im alright.
im a happy person(:
it was like;
deep cut to the throat, hurt like hell even though im not suppose to feel this way.
i think its for real this time, i tried alot times before.
I need more than this, and what jayne love told me was right.it's not my loss anyway.
please my girls,stop me if im doing it all over again.
like ah juju says; don't give chance.direct shoot.simple.
it probably mean i have to lose you along the way.but its good for me, i know.
Hope all the aunties are nice, cos i like aunties and they like to tell stories.haha(:
classes with pahman is like wtf, seriously.you can see sana singh literally bootlicking him.
i don't think i heard a word he said in class today, im so done with the assignments.
so done and over with!YAY!(:
they say i need to make up my mind.
yeah i think i already did last night, thank you all for being so honest.
even though i seem confused.but im alright.
im a happy person(:
it was like;
deep cut to the throat, hurt like hell even though im not suppose to feel this way.
i think its for real this time, i tried alot times before.
I need more than this, and what jayne love told me was right.it's not my loss anyway.
please my girls,stop me if im doing it all over again.
like ah juju says; don't give chance.direct shoot.simple.
it probably mean i have to lose you along the way.but its good for me, i know.
what we could have been, 12:50 PM.
Sunday, April 13, 2008
I think I secured the job at Queensway's Ikea
Just need Melvin the cafe's manager to confirm my position and my starting date on monday(:
back to working after such a long break, feels good to always have extra cash, to pay my own bill and pay for the kittens' boarding.i probably won't be left with much.but whatever that is left, is
additional to what mama gives me(:
todaybffbert text me, and told me he placed the mahjong tile back and that he still loves me.
im like, how comforted, really.it means a lot a lot to me.He will never know how it feels to get back what you had but different.
even though, i know it will never be the same again.
you've found another one to share your fun, joy and laughter.I know its not a replacement, but it sucks for me to see it unfold in front of me, with your silly explainations that doesn't make sense.
i still love you.
Just need Melvin the cafe's manager to confirm my position and my starting date on monday(:
back to working after such a long break, feels good to always have extra cash, to pay my own bill and pay for the kittens' boarding.i probably won't be left with much.but whatever that is left, is
additional to what mama gives me(:
today
im like, how comforted, really.it means a lot a lot to me.He will never know how it feels to get back what you had but different.
even though, i know it will never be the same again.
you've found another one to share your fun, joy and laughter.I know its not a replacement, but it sucks for me to see it unfold in front of me, with your silly explainations that doesn't make sense.
i still love you.
what we could have been, 11:49 PM.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Had a very bad weekend this week.
haven't had such a heated quarrel with my mama for such a long time.
I know its partly my fault.I know I should know better than that to choose to go out at such a time.But the way she shout at me and with the words that she chooses to use is not very nice.
its as worse as the vulgarites that i use but in a refined manner.sigh.
once on friday night, once on saturday morning.
today i sort of did it on purpose, went out the whole day, surprisingly she really meant what she said, she say i can do whatever i want, and she doesn't and would not care.but i don't want to and will not push the limits.i still respect her because of her role.
she asked me to go to hell this morning before i went out.like the way she asked daddy to.i didn't even want to give a come back to what she said cos simply it would'nt matter since she's so fixed on the judgement she choose to pass, by the entries of this blog she happen to bump into. which is sad.cos no matter how much inner turmoil i struggle with, im generally a happy person, neither do i put off the responsibilites i have to fufil, my friends are good people, they're just different, but for now, they make up my moments of escapism.they make me happy even if for a while.
i need my rest, i understand she needs it too.i just need someone to stand in for me so i can take a break.and escape.once a week at least can?she can take her time out too, i think we just need a communication system and more give and take.
i find it so hard to tell her all this.or to even apologise, i hope i can text her on monday and apologise or something.i don't want to be childish and run over the limits, i want to prove to her im the same person i was and i don't mind helping her.because i understand.
i just hope she speaks nicely to the people around her before she starts judging the way they speak.
i don't think im a bad person.
im 19.i still want to experience love and life to the max.
Moving on, will be going for a interview tomorrow at ikea.i hope i get the job, since it's near my place.I need the cash anyway, to pay off debts and other stuff i want to get for myself.
Hope i'll have a happy entry the next time i blog.
haven't had such a heated quarrel with my mama for such a long time.
I know its partly my fault.I know I should know better than that to choose to go out at such a time.But the way she shout at me and with the words that she chooses to use is not very nice.
its as worse as the vulgarites that i use but in a refined manner.sigh.
once on friday night, once on saturday morning.
today i sort of did it on purpose, went out the whole day, surprisingly she really meant what she said, she say i can do whatever i want, and she doesn't and would not care.but i don't want to and will not push the limits.i still respect her because of her role.
she asked me to go to hell this morning before i went out.like the way she asked daddy to.i didn't even want to give a come back to what she said cos simply it would'nt matter since she's so fixed on the judgement she choose to pass, by the entries of this blog she happen to bump into. which is sad.cos no matter how much inner turmoil i struggle with, im generally a happy person, neither do i put off the responsibilites i have to fufil, my friends are good people, they're just different, but for now, they make up my moments of escapism.they make me happy even if for a while.
i need my rest, i understand she needs it too.i just need someone to stand in for me so i can take a break.and escape.once a week at least can?she can take her time out too, i think we just need a communication system and more give and take.
i find it so hard to tell her all this.or to even apologise, i hope i can text her on monday and apologise or something.i don't want to be childish and run over the limits, i want to prove to her im the same person i was and i don't mind helping her.because i understand.
i just hope she speaks nicely to the people around her before she starts judging the way they speak.
i don't think im a bad person.
im 19.i still want to experience love and life to the max.
Moving on, will be going for a interview tomorrow at ikea.i hope i get the job, since it's near my place.I need the cash anyway, to pay off debts and other stuff i want to get for myself.
Hope i'll have a happy entry the next time i blog.
what we could have been, 1:41 AM.
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
YOU CONFUSE ME.
what we could have been, 11:59 AM.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
gonna blog about the longest sunday ever(:
woke up at 8am to meet up with the others at 11am to finish part b of tvrp assignment.
we did a renactment of machi's music video- machi.
the location was at queenstown and margaret drive.
and only wrapped up at like 6 plus 7?yeah.
we did like 964972964 takes of every single scene cos every single scene we would crack some stupid joke or laugh or something.
very sweet of huneee, bert and lau da to help us out with the filming, you guys make really good actors.being enthu is like winning half of the battle already(: THANK YOU!
anyway, acting is inborn in bert.so HAHA he was glad he can help and also conveniently stole the show haha.it was really fun but very very tiring.and we were damn stink at the end of the day.everyone's expression was like SIAN.you can say almost expressionless.haha.
i was a boy for a day.boys are like boring as hell.i kissed stefy in the mv.haha go eat your heart out bitches.bert says im disgusting.well, whatever.
today's day 2.
only starting to feel worse and more grumpy.uneasy, uncomfortable like something's missing.
they all say i don't know what i want.i know what i want, but i can't have what i want.And its too risky to fight for what i want.you know what i mean?sigh.
i even press the keyboard's keys faster so not to see our pictures.the more i look at them, the more they confuse me.but im going to stay focused on my agenda.simply cos its good for me
went to class today, didn't even take down a single word from the board the lecturer is seriously pissing off everyone cos he only cares for
we watched our mv like 5 times.somehow today went fairly quickly.
im really unhappy today.its the second time in half a year):
i hope i can say im okay and mean it soon.
i don't need a man to make it happen.
ouch,im sore.
HAHA(:
just for laughs:ppjy combo.
what we could have been, 1:41 PM.
Monday, April 7, 2008
i gave it 2 days thought,after discussion and reassurance.
i've decided.
okay!im giving up on you!(:
and not because you're not good, you're very good.
because it's simply not going anywhere.
and because i'm your friend.
im not okay, i know.but i've decided so YEAH.
4 days.im loveless again(:
make me fall in love with you!haha.
today is such a long long day.i'll blog about it tomorrow cos i miss blogging(:
i've decided.
okay!im giving up on you!(:
and not because you're not good, you're very good.
because it's simply not going anywhere.
and because i'm your friend.
im not okay, i know.but i've decided so YEAH.
4 days.im loveless again(:
make me fall in love with you!haha.
today is such a long long day.i'll blog about it tomorrow cos i miss blogging(:
what we could have been, 12:50 AM.
Saturday, April 5, 2008
hello april(:
i miss blogging a lot.
i hope i come home with a workable charger tomorrow then i'll be able to use back my own laptop(:
okay toodles.
i miss blogging a lot.
i hope i come home with a workable charger tomorrow then i'll be able to use back my own laptop(:
okay toodles.
what we could have been, 1:13 AM.
